Sunday, January 23, 2011

Give me eyes to see more of who You are

The Greatness of Our God by Hillsong
Give me eyes to see
More of who You are
May what I behold,
still my anxious heart.
Take what I have known
And break it all apart
For You my God, are greater still.


CHORUS


No sky contains,
No doubt restrains,
All You are,
The greatness of our God.
I spend my life to know,
And I'm far from close
To all You are,
The greatness of our God.


Verse 2:


Give me grace to see
Beyond this moment here.
To believe that there
Is nothing left to fear.
That You alone are high above it all.
For You my God, are greater still.




Bridge: 2x


And there is nothing
That can ever separate us.
There is nothing that can ever
separate us from Your love.
No life, no death, of this I am convinced.
You my God, are greater still.


And no words can say, or song convey,
all You are the greatness of our God.
I spend my life to know,
And I'm far from close
to all You are,
the greatness of our God
 
 
 
 
We sang this song recently at the Greenville Free Methodist Church during morning worship and I can not get it out of my head.  It really is a song that hits many of us if not at all at the state of the heart.  I think so many times it is hard to really take a moment, step back and digest the Greatness of our God.  That no matter how big or small the burden, need, desire, heartache --- it doesnt come close to what God is capable of....  
 
"I spend my life to know, and I'm far from close, to all You are..."
I will absolutely spend my entire life wanting to know, and not even come close to grasping the greatness of my God and I think sometimes that has terrified me.  Like possibly that is in a way another failure of mine, but its not.  It is comforting instead if you really think about it.  That its ok, God is bigger and greater than I alone can fathom all at once, but its because of that that I can find comfort and shelter.  At the same time I have to remember that where I really fail is realizing that greatness, realizing how it pertains to me, in the middle of the situation.  What I fail to do the most is pray and live with passionate and unwavering certainty that He is in control.
 
"no sky contains, no doubt restrains all You are".  My doubt in my head and heart restrain Him all the time but that doesn't stop Him from working. That does not bind Him or contain Him to the limits of my fractured mind.  These words are like an anthem or promise I need to continually remind myself.  
 
The first verse is my quiet prayer right now.  Exactly where I am.  In fact, that is why I am even more so leaning on the idea of staying in Greenville (no matter the opportunity) and let this be a place where I can really focus on Him.  He has awakened something in me since I arrived-- slowly-- but very strongly have I been realizing just how deep He goes, and how I in my current state have so much to learn.  Being a PK and a PC (pastor's kid and professional christian) my whole life, I really plateaued a long time ago when it came to God's word and the new life He brings.  I had thought I knew it all or had heard those passages, parables, stories, etc, so many times that I could not possibly get anything more.  Here in Greenville, i dont know if it is the church, or the awesome people in my small group who pursue God, or just the absence of most of my routine distractions, but I am reading the scripture and feel as though I have never laid my eyes or ears on it before.  It looks and sounds familiar, but I am getting a whole different meaning and perspective. 
 
Now you may be reading this and getting really impressed with my confession here, like wow, Katrina is really doing great.  Well what I have failed to mention is that, the reading and the awakening I have been getting is very small doses from church on sunday morning and bible study tuesday night.  I have yet to really get to a place where I actively, on my own, with out anyone watching--read the bible.  I do not have a regularly scheduled quiet time other than when I find myself in front of the tv almost comatose.  I hunger, but not to the point of starvation that makes me eager to consume His word. And it pains me.  I dont know how I got here.  Not my parents fault as they made us do devotions before school every morning, no matter how much kicking and screaming.  I have just been relying on my "tribal knowledge" of the Bible and God-stuff (religion, theology, church etiquette) to get me through.  NOT. GOOD. ENOUGH. not even a little. 
 
So I pray: "Lord, Give me eyes to see more of who You are
May what I behold, still my anxious heart
Take what I have known and break it all apart
For you my God, are greater still...."(note: to listen to the song, see link at the top to youtube)

1 comment:

  1. Wow that is Great Katrina! God loves to love you and guide you. We are praying for you and Judah!

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